you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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