WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
I realized courtney is my jiminy cricket but instead of preventing me from telling lies she prevents me from fucking strangers
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
Randomize
