Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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