Dude there are two smokin hot chicks laying outside my apartment...I almost want to tell them theyre laying where I threw up last night
U should. Its a good ice breaker
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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