I can tuck mytits in my pants
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA.
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
Randomize
