You're a womanizer and a bitch.
you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
