What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize
