Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
Acid is not a monday night drug
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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