I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
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