Sponge bath it is.
i just took a sip of diet coke and i said " as soon as it hits my lips i wanna smoke a cig." then i thought of your dick.
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
Randomize
