Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
Randomize
