It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
Randomize
