morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
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