just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
im having a threesome with these popsicles
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
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She tied me up with her honor cords...
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
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The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
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