i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
Randomize