so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
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