Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
I wish there were whore gnomes that cleaned our apartment when we were gone.
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
Im at a party and this guy hitting on me just showed me his 'caution choking hazard' tattoo right above his penis. There goes any chance he had of getting laid tonight.
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
Randomize
