I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
Hey when I die alone will you come by often enough so that my cats don’t eat my face?
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
Randomize
