i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
Randomize
