so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
How was your sisters wedding?
Oh, I didn't go. I slept through my alarm. I finally woke up and was like...I don't think so.
sisterhood ftl.
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
Randomize