walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
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