I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
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