What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
Jerry, you need to find god
rolled in at 7am w/ 2 girls i met at the strip club. my neighbor was getting up to mow the lawn before he took his kids to school. i'm 31. he's younger. if given the chance, you think he'd want to switch places?
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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