You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
I'm training him to sit when I whistle the tune from the hunger games. I'm going to be the coolest parent ever.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
why the fuck is there hamburger meat in the toaster. i repeat: WHY THE FUCK IS THERE HAMBURGER MEAT IN MY NEW TOASTER
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
Randomize
