i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
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