The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
Reason #3 women are better than men: texting and peeing simultaneously. Write THAT in the fucking snow.
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
25 People Confess The Biggest Betrayal They Have Ever Faced
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
25 Odd Things These Pathetic People Do For Enjoyment
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
I have poison ivy on my dick
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.