The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
Randomize
