As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
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