Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
Woke up backwards on a recliner
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Randomize
