Just fell off a train. Bad.
the vacuum is drunk
what?
i spilled my drink and tried to vacuum it and now the vacuum is drunk
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
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