Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
Randomize