Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
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