My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
Guess who got arrested for public drunkiness, and called jimmy johns for the entire station last night instead of someone to bail me out? The cop that arrested me drove me home. Win.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
Randomize