You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
Heard flapping noises behind me. It was my roommate flapping her bathrobe like wings, saying "I'm a faaaiiiiry."
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
