32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
If I brought two seashells to Lowe's, do you think that they'd drill two holes in each shell for me? I need to be a mermaid on Saturday...
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Randomize