it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Randomize
