I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
I could make wine with my vomit
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
FYI, your girlfriend is on her way to the ER. She tried to balance a bottle of jack on her chest. Smashed toes, blood all over patio. Call her, kinda funny though.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
Randomize
