would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
what the fuck happened to the tacos
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
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