i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had sex on a dog bed..
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
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