there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
Randomize
