its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
Randomize
