I changed my tire completely alone.. I could totally win survivor
Its my greatest physical accomplishment
yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
If I could text you the sound of me vomming, I would.
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
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