I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
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