what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
I flashed the bar tender last night. Apparently I wanted a whiskey to go and that was the golden ticket. This is why I never come home
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
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