Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
I just got carded by a ten year old.
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
Randomize