This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
You asked the waitress for a vasectomy and handed her a butter knife, like you were ordering something from the menu
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
Randomize
