I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
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