he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular
Wrong number and your a loser
You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Randomize