Don't you send me to vm
i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
Randomize
