i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
Just so you know sleeping with you is like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
That's the most romantic thing I've ever heard
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
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