So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
Randomize
