Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
Last night I had a dream we played Uno and had sex. You won at Uno, but you lost at sex.
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
Do you remember when I jumped into your arms and you farted?
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
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